Funeral Etiquette

When Should I Visit?

When you find out that someone has died, it's okay to visit their family at home, but the best place to do so is at the funeral home, where you can offer your condolences. Anyone who wants to visit the family and help them out before the services can do these things to make them feel better. Some things you can do to help the grieving family are offer to bring them food, help with childcare, and run errands or do chores for them.

What Should I Say?

This is the question that most people who want to pay their respects ask. You can't really put into words how deep a loss is, but saying a few nice things to the family of the person who died shows that you care. Try not to talk about your problems or say that the deceased relative is better off now.

Where Should I Sit?

A lot of people go to funerals and don't know where to sit. Usually, family members sit in the front rows at both the funeral and the visitation service. If you are not a family member, sit behind the seats that are set aside for family.

What Should I Do?

It's very important to be on time. When you go into the funeral home or any other place, try to be as quiet as possible. If you are going to the visitation, talk to the family members who are still alive and offer your condolences before you sit down. It is not okay to use your phone during a service. If you really need to answer a message or call, say you're sorry and go to another room or outside.

What Should I Do About Children?

There isn't a clear answer to this question, but whether or not a child should go to a visitation or funeral service depends on the situation, their relationship with the deceased and their family, their age, and whether or not they can behave properly. If you decide to bring your child to a service, tell them what will happen and how they should act while they are there.

What Should I Give?

Sending flowers to the funeral home or the person's home is a nice way to say you're sorry. Sometimes, the family may ask that instead of flowers, people give money to a specific foundation. These requests should be respected. Another way to show respect for people who are grieving is to bring them food. Sending the family a sympathy card would be a less expensive and perfectly fine choice. There is no set time or date when cards can be sent.